כנגד כל הסיכויים
Gimli of Lord of the Rings: "Certainty of death, small chance of success- what are we waiting for?"
1. I was a lost sinner from conception in my mother's womb to the later summer of 2004 (Born Again by Keith Green): namely, I was in conceived and born in original sin, total depravity, radical corruption and actual transgressions but completely outside of Jesus Christ by God's choice alone unto it was the foredetermined and appointed hour for God's Spirit accompanied with His Word to spiritually quicken me unto the glory of the mercy of Jesus Christ as the only God-man. There was a real experience where I felt like I ended up in hell more than one time when I was a young boy. I could not get saved so I sinned greatly in words of saying "hell." I felt like I was taken out of hell because the agony is something I cannot explain. I would forget I needed to be saved but there was a real sense that I knew the truth by direct work of the Spirit in Romans 1:19: namely, not only the handiwork of God in creation but also Reformed divine truth but I could not embrace it in a saving way in and of myself though I gave a civil effort to embrace it but sometimes I could not even do that.2. I was baptized by pouring on the infant's head in the "Roman Catholic Church" concerning the Roman form of infant baptism of baptismal regeneration (but it is not pure water because of Roman oil) as a little baby under my Catholic parents at the time by a Roman Catholic priest, but when I was spiritually awakened and a had a genuine leading of the Spirit I rejected "baptismal regeneration" but embraced "monergistic regeneration" or "spiritual circumcision." That is, it is simply not the sinner's work in cooperation or anything else, but it is God's choice in changing the heart of stone into a heart of flesh (Jn 1:13; Rom 9:11, 16; Tit 3:5; Jn 3).
3. I attended Ivory Hedge Nursery School in a Jewish Temple (out of business), from kindergarten to third grade in public school Wanamassa Elementary School - Ocean Township School District, and than I transferred to a Catholic school from fourth grade to eighth grade (out of business). My personality was very kind, shy and dependent upon my mother and father and playing with my four brothers. I had difficulty learning because of ear infections. It was hard to learn because I heard the sounds as if under water. I struggled in grammar school in regards to learning. To sum it up, the various teachers did not know how to deal with a learning disabled child because in their background they did not have special education learning. My learning disability focused on a perceptional disability in only reading, learning and observing the materials. In a real theological sense, Satan has the ability to influence things touching the body if allowed. To sum it up, I have good reason to believe that this came from Satan's intentional yet clever mishandling toward myself when I was a little boy outside of Christ. It is his plan because he knows my testimony is lethal to his plan if used by God. In my undergraduate studies at Brookdale Community College under Dr. Robinson in an "education course" he mentioned that there are different levels of learning disabilities and minimal brain damage depending on the case, but most likely for those with a lesser degree of disability. At the Catholic school they provided for me with a very excellent tutor in which I would use later on in my school studies. I also learned to read by the passed Beatrice Lasky Obituary - LONG BRANCH, New Jersey of the Monmouth Reading Center. Seventh and eighth grade marked a excellent time of learning, better teachers and parochial basketball back-to-back championships. During this time, I did not know a holy Triune God, but I attended the Roman Mass besides confirmation and confession at St Mary of the Assumption Parish Deal, NJ 07723 - Parishes Online. The Sr. Ellen was very understanding in allowing me to learn the Roman Catholic material. It seemed like the nuns loved me at the grammar school level especially Sr. Barbara. I am not sure what happened to them because it has been so long. At this time in all of this, I was outside of Jesus Christ.
4. I am to try to focus somewhere in the past of my grammar school days. A holy Triune God came to me when I was a little boy, because I desired things in life. What do I remember? I asked things of Him and He gave them to me, but I felt empty in having it. I ended up rejecting it, but He taught me that His Son is the essentials of essentials. It means it could have very well be God the Father, but how do I understand my story like an unSamual Samual? It taught me that I need Jesus above add-ons, but it is my apocryphal story that does not add to the unaddable Scriptures. As a born again person now, I can't see anything that was wrong in what the audible voice said.
5. Somewhere in the past, I had an encounter with two elect angels. What did they say? Both told me that I was outside of Jesus Christ: namely, they desired to train me in the things of God but there times when they were angry with me. I tried to believe but I could not believe. This would happen over and over again in my life in an unseeking seeking of Jesus Christ or what could be called a civil seeking that is different than a Christian seeking. Though there may be other things I am not remembering, what did I take from it? I took from it that they told me that I was in the wrong "religion." I tried to go to another church but it did not work and I tried staying home, but that did not work. I ended up going to Rome but they told me that Reformed Theology was true. How do I understand this? If I examine their words in light of the infallible Scriptures alone, that I now am supernaturally awakened, I will agree that somehow it was ministering elect angels helping me.
6. The fat elect angel said I was called to be a Reformed pastor and he would set up things for me to be a pastor starting very young but I failed to meet his "appointment." This happened many times, but he said I was called to be a "reformer." He is an elect angel that helps me to this day, but as a little boy I told the Roman priests this announcement. I use to attend something like everyday in the Roman Church with my mom in bringing toys with me but I also sat quietly with her, but I also wanted to be a priest in my younger years. The priest said I was too young, but I was warned not to go with them. I honestly felt a evil presence that taught me I would get harmed. I told the priest about the "reformer idea" and he turned me over to Satan. I will not get into what that caused (not because of a superior spirituality) but because you would not believe your eyes (this also happened again but with someone else that I will not get into), but let's just say it was surely not of a holy Triune God and I defy a satanic sensationalism. In passing, I believe the exorcisms by Rome are a "cover-up" for the condemned ministry of Judas Iscariot. I would take the view that Rome is behind the source of those she outwardly ministers to in exorcisms. What does it mean? It simply means they cause it and than they seek to fix it for the glory of Rome.
7. During my grammar school days, my dad was a follower of biblical Christianity. That is, he was an evangelical who prayed for Catholics in the Roman Mass who bowed the knee to Jesus Christ in his guitar shop. He shared with me that it is not additions to Jesus but faith alone in Christ alone. I would later share with my grandmother that it is by faith alone, but we had discussions and at this time I had a civil belief that is different from a true belief. Later after my conversion, he advocated partial preterism, predestinarianism and Reformed Theology. He was a genius on guitars and engineering, but we loved to sit down and talk about the Bible. He also was licensed in natural medicine in homeopathy (this was unknown to most) in rejection to the occult but with a Christian outlook that a holy Triune God provided a remedy for every illness regarding a God-intended cure in various herbs over the earth and he would die for his patient. I think it is most noteworthy to mention my dad, because like the elect angels they would always encourage belief even in the secret absence of the Spirit in hopes of God granting what He commands (St. Augustine) but there was a secret knowledge by a holy Triune God (that I realize by looking back) that knew when I would come to saving faith in the self-existent Triune Majesty later on. For the King's glory about my dad:
8.) At a young age I had a realization that something very terrible would happen about real murder and rape (I was unable to say where, who, what, how, when), but I was alerted by a different "angel friend" to tell a Orthodox Presbyterian pastor who also was a compassionate policeman and there were other witnesses who were policemen yet it was hidden but who they were I am honestly not sure. None of this was in person, but it was hidden yet good. It did not help anything, but Theodore knew all about it and he embraced 2 Timothy 2:10 as a lifestyle in dealing with me. I did not understand foredetermined predestinarianism so it could not be stopped. I was just a little boy. There a sense where a second cause can be undone through prayer if a holy Triune God allows it to happen, but sometimes He does not accept prayers to stop something foreseen. How did I foresee it? I worked with a Orthodox Presbyterian elect angel, Theodore Murphy, and he imparted the gift of prophecy to me so I could foresee problems especially my outward testimony but with him it is always love in hope without wishful thinking. How is it possible for a pre-converted elect sinner outside of Christ to have the gift of prophecy from Jesus? Tell me, how is it possible for men to be burned at the stake for the outward appearance of Jesus and yet not have love? Again with my friend he would always encourage belief.
9.) At an early age I had an encounter with Satan at different times. There was a very terrible encounters but someone (who was a true friend) said use your fingers as a Cross. There was another case where demons attacked me as a little boy but I gave up. After conversion, I would later realize it and repented. I remember Satan saying an approbation (or approval) of his assassin who I would not be able to stop. Who is the friend of Satan? He is what I call the new Balaam (Manuel Gomes). Satan furthers a non-judgmental psychology that furthers his license to sin and the same for his friend. I tested it what happened with the Word. I remember a wicked laughter by Satan. Lets just say it is terrible. I also had encounter with God who warned me not to go to a live away camp, but like a brain deed fool I forget what He said and remembered sometime when I was at camp. This happened in the later summer of 1994, but a holy Triune God countered it in the later summer of 2004. The worst encounter I had with Satan was at the 1994 assault. I can't explain it to you but I can only say that it was very, very bad.
10.) The enemy is furthered through the occultism of Satan in futuristic Satanism. That is, they want to know the future but there is also a counter-intelligence among the enemies of God where they spy on God's angels and fallen sinners to get information. There is also another way that they can information but this remains hidden through manipulation of prying into God's holy secrets. To sum it, the enemy knew that I would be born again in the later summer of 2004 and they persecuted me before the time at the 1994 assault. These occultic people love the hatred of R-E-F-O-R-M-E-D T-H-E-O-L-O-G-Y. In short, I was brutally harmed mentally, emotionally, psychologically, spiritually, physically and sexually. This occurred at the age of 15. I was a sacrifice in satanic ritual in the pursuit of hell's glory by a children of the spiritual Nero.
...I will add more to it as the days linger on in another post...Farewell.
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